I am open

It's New Year's Eve, Saturday, December 31, 2016. I'm not the type of person to engage in a look back and make resolutions based on some particular day on the calendar. Or at least, I don't like to think of myself as that type of person. And yet, here I am writing this four hours before 2016 ends (at least in my time zone). So here we are. Before we go any further I want to put you on notice that I am going to be sharing specifics. Things may get ugly, raw and hard to read. Feel free to stop right here and return to whatever you were doing before you came across this post.

Here we are, again

I've been filling out applications to become a full-time employee of different web development companies. I did get one response that said they couldn't even come close to my expected salary range. Apart from that, it's been a deafening silence. (I guess I never did write about interviewing with a company that did extend an offer for $95,000. However, we had discussed that I was looking for $115K - $125K. On all my applications since then, I've been specifying that I was seeking $120K - $130K.)

I was wrong

It's so important for me to record this right now. It's the reason I started this blog in the first place.

I feel like I've had my whole world turned upside down. I feel like I'm a fool who has been living in an alternate reality, a fantasy world. I feel like I've been totally delusional.

It's time

I'm ready to unleash my power. I'm ready to take advantage of the opportunities that come my way. I'm ready to live up to my potential. I'm ready to make the fiftieth year of my life a breakout year.

I've had my more-focused times and less-focused times over these last six years or so. On the whole I have to admit that I've been fairly undisciplined and scattered. While it's been fun to have the flexibility and to explore different things, it has also carried a certain cost both financially and emotionally.

Oops, I did it again

Overall, I had a great time at Udemy Live. I'm definitely looking forward to attending again next year. It's not important for me to record all the details of the weekend. The highlight was getting the chance to meet fellow instructors and Udemy staff in person. The two other things that I will note are that I did end up really enjoying Oz, The Mentalist, and Seth Godin's keynote, even though I had scoffed at both of those things when they were announced.

My life is blessed

Eli wanted to head out to the reservoir this morning to see if the crane was out there. We didn't see it at the end near our house, but Eli said he wanted to walk all the way around. We did see it at the far end. It was a real joy getting to do that early(ish) morning activity with my son. We got to hear so many different bird calls and Zen also loved being out for a walk in the field.

As we got back to my house and walked up the boardwalk in the back yard, I looked at Eli's jungle gym and my garden (as overgrown with weeds as it is) and felt such a feeling of happiness.

How many things could really go wrong?

First off, the title is not about stating the circumstances in my life. There is nothing going wrong right now. Things are going well overall. The title is meant to be a reality check. It's a true question. How many things could really go wrong? There are only so many that can go wrong. Many things will go right. Therefore, it's not necessary for me to plan for a ridiculous amount of things going wrong. I don't need a plan "A" and back it up with plans, B, C, D, E, F, . . . Plan "A" and Plan "B" should generally be sufficient.

Following through

It was just over two weeks ago that I wrote about reading "Callings" by Gregg Levoy. I finished it a few days ago. I also contacted the author to tell him I'd like to interview him for my "Inspiration for Success" Blabcast. He got back to me that same day telling me that he'd be willing to do it. I followed up to answer some of his questions and to get the ball rolling. Unfortunately, I have not received a response. Bummer.

I think I need to dance now

Recently I came across a Tedx talk in which the speaker said "leaders are readers" and that everybody should be reading every day. He went as far as to say we could all afford to spend 10 minutes reading every day, and if we did so we would end up reading twelve books each year. What he said made sense to me and I decided to start reading. I chose a book, "Callings: Finding and Following an Authentic Life", by Gregg Levoy that I had in my basement and which I had read previously.